Blogging saved my life.

 

In 2014, I was at a breaking point in my life.  I was depressed, lonely and lost even though every day I put a smile on my face and pretended that everything was perfect.  I didn’t realize how close I was to the breaking point until I decided to start blogging.

 

Blogging led me to a year of self-growth, self-healing and self-love.  A year that was filled with the lowest lows and some of the highest highs.  A year that completely changed how I parent my children, how I love my husband and how I live my life.

 

My story was painful, raw, true and heartbreaking.

My story was also full of redemption, happiness and empowerment.

 

It was in those moments of darkest despair that I wrote about.  My blog helped me to release all of the thoughts that were consuming me.  I remember publishing my first blog post.  A blog post that was 11 years in the making.  A blog post that bared the ugly truth of my past, being sexually assaulted.  A truth that I had kept secret for 11 years because I felt dirty, ugly and ashamed.  

 

That shame led me to hate who I was on the inside and outside.  That shame led me to feel unworthy of the life that I had.  That shame allowed the darkness to grow inside so that I no longer even knew who I was.

 

In 2014, I decided to start a blog.  Blogging was sold to me as an online journal and that no one would read it.  Now, I would probably be offended by no one reading my blog but in 2014, those were the words that I needed to hear.  But something different happened.  

 

Instead, I had women reading my blog and sending me messages.  Messages that were thanking me for being so brave and for sharing my story.  Messages that were telling me that I wasn’t alone.  (And for 11 years, I felt incredibly isolated and alone in my pain.)  Messages that were telling me that because of my story, they were ready to share theirs.  

 

What those women didn’t realize was that they were helping me heal.  Not the other way around.  They gave me the strength to continue sharing the pieces of my story that were the hardest to share.  They gave me the courage to stand in my own power and be open and honest with where I was in my healing journey.

 

So, yes, blogging saved my life but maybe not in the way you had imagined it did.

 

It gave me my voice back after so many years of being silenced.

It gave me my power back after giving it away for 11 years.

It gave me the chance to heal what I thought was going to be broken forever.

It gave me the chance to be the best mother, wife and woman that I could be in this life.

It gave me the chance to rediscover who I was and who I wanted to be.

It gave me a new Samantha.  A Samantha that I didn’t think would ever exist again.

 

I want you to know that you have a story to tell.  It doesn’t have to be traumatic like mine.  We have all had moments when life has taught us lessons that we weren’t ready to learn yet but here we are, still standing even if we are covered in bruises.

 

I want to help you fall in love with your past.  I want you to tell the world that there is no shame in your story.  I want you to inspire people.  I want you to change the world and create an impact that you never thought you could.  

 

Are you ready to do that?  Are you ready to say yes to your past, to your healing and to your power? 

Hello beautiful, my name is Samantha. Here is a part of my story.

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Located in Calgary, Alberta