Standing in front of a crowd that contained a mixture of students my age and adults that I didn’t know was terrifying. I was about to read out loud words that I had written myself. 16 years old and putting myself at the mercy of the judges that were sitting on the panel. Scary doesn’t even begin to describe the emotions of that day. Maybe I was preparing myself for what I am doing today.
I stood there shaking but still managing to read the words on that page. Everyone began to clap and I felt proud. I felt like I accomplished the most terrifying thing I would ever have to do. Sharing my words to those who didn’t know me.
It can be scary not knowing how people are going to react to the words that you write. We have all been witness to some awful reactions on social media. Maybe I am lucky. I haven’t had too much negativity come from what I write on my blog and on social media. That doesn’t mean that I haven’t had any.
HOW TO MOVE PAST THE FEAR AND SHARE YOUR STORY
There is a HUGE lesson that I have learned over the past 5.5 years of blogging. It doesn’t matter what others think of my story. I am sharing my story through my perspective. Their perspective doesn’t matter when it comes to my story. This is easier said than done but knowing that how they will react isn’t about you will help to begin this transformation.
Accepting your past is the first part of moving beyond the fear of sharing your words. When we accept our past, we begin to accept where we are in life and the choices that we made along the way. Your past isn’t meant to be shameful. Your past happened to teach you something. It happened so that you can be where you presently are. Accepting your past means that you are accepting who you are in the present moment.
Having a support system that will be there to cheer you on is going to impact you in a positive way. This will help to lessen the burden of taking the hate from others because you have a close community of people who support you 100%. They may not understand why you are sharing your story and that is okay. As long as they are supportive of you doing so, talk to them. Share with them your concerns, your fears, and the feedback that you get. Be open and honest.
Be open to other’s opinions. Now, this doesn’t mean that you allow them to tell you how you should feel or how you should have reacted. That is NEVER okay. Everyone is going to have a different opinion and it is based on so many different aspects of life. That is okay. Allow your blog to be a space for open discussion. What works for you may not work for someone else. Be a safe place for those who want to share ideas and lessons that they have learned.
Remember that your story is going to change the life of a stranger. To help me with my fear of sharing my story, I would print off messages that I received from women thanking me. It was in these messages that I found my strength when I questioned everything that I was doing. These women reminded me that despite the dark and painful moments, I was allowing them to also heal from their past. I was reminding them that despite wanting to continue on, I did and continue to do so. That the power in my words and in my actions is needed to help those around me.
It helps to remember that it isn’t the women who comment on my blog posts or on my social media that need me the most. It is the women that are watching me from a distance. The ones still too afraid to speak up, comment, or message me. They are listening and learning. They are leaning on me for strength even when I don’t know that they are there. It is in these moments that my fear completely vanishes and I remember why I am doing what I am doing.
That day in front of that crowd, I became a different person without knowing that I was growing and shifting. Fear didn’t win. There have been so many times that I moved past the fear and took control of what I truly wanted and needed. It is time for you to do the same. What are you allowing fear to take away from you?